Do you ever watch those movies in which the main character wakes up one day unhappy with his/her life and vows to make big, dramatic changes?
I think that those are generally illogical movies because the thing that frustrates the person is the actions of others and how they inter-relate or fail to relate in a healthy way. Basically, they vow, not to have deep interior authentic change, but to move to a new set of circumstances, unaware that they are taking their troubles with them.
I had one of those "Aha - time to wake up" moments last night in my small group meeting. I am not moving to Des Moines to start over. I feel I must tell you at this point that Des Moines is French for Void of All Life, just in case you are at a crisis moment and thinking of making a big, dramatic change. If you are thinking of moving to Iowa, someone needs to grab you by the shoulders and shake you until your brain becomes connected to your nervous system once more.
With my revelation came the knowledge that I need to lean more in the direction of faith and trusting God, and less in the direction of pessimism and unbelief. My negativity has made me quite the critic in ways that are not synergistic to say the least.
Also, would you like to send donations to my Airplane Fund? It seems like when Christians make big life changes that suddenly they start stumping for some non-profit cause and insisting that everyone should give them money. Since I am making a life change, and you do stand to benefit because you read my blog, you should consider sending an envelope filled with money to my home address. Mark it, "Airplane Fund."